For Teenage Girls …

Trying Times

Clista Heintzman

If you are a teenage girl, you are probably going through an exciting and enlightening yet confusing and challenging time. Am I right? These terms I have used to describe your life right now are so contradictory, yet so true. You are growing and changing so quickly. You want to embrace all the changes happening in your life, but you do not quite know how or to what extent you should embrace them. You want to “put on the gas” in life, and your parents seem to want to “put on the brakes.”

At your age you are able to do almost anything an adult does. The problem lies in the fact that many things you are able to do right now might not be right or safe for you to do. For instance, you are probably able to use a computer. You may know how to do as much or more than your parents when it comes to using the computer. Why do your parents most likely not allow you to fully use your skills? Your parents have more judgment and life experiences than you do. They realize the dangers of things like chat rooms and “Myspace.” With age come greater maturity and better decision-making skills. Respect your parents and “put on the brakes.”

As a teenager, you have the physical ability to engage in sexual activity. You probably know of students at your school who have sex with their boyfriends. God’s word says it would be wrong for you to have sex before you are married. (1 Thessalonians 4:3-4) Although there are many diseases that can be transmitted through sex that your school may mention from time to time, the ultimate reason for abstaining from sex now is that God says to keep yourself pure. Save yourself for that one special person you will one day marry. You will not be sorry. Respect God and yourself and “put on the brakes.”

Many of you probably have your driver’s license. This is an exciting time and can give you a feeling of independence. Sometimes the attitude that you should be able to go wherever you want, whenever you want, presents itself. Your parents have a different idea. They want to know where you are going and with whom you are going. They want to know when you will be back. Why do they need to know these things?

You may ask, “Don’t they trust me?” “Do they still think I’m a little kid?” “Don’t they want me to have any fun?” First, your parents do trust you if you have been honest with them in the past. Their trust in you is not likely the reason they do not allow you to do certain things. Most likely it is because they do not fully trust others. Parents are always thinking ahead and trying to look out for your safety. As a teenager, try to understand how they feel. When you are permitted to go somewhere alone or with others, if you will be out most of the day, call your parents just to “touch base” at some point during the day. If you are delayed and will be home later than you said you would be, call and let your parents know you will be late. Doing these things will build trust between you and your parents.

Do your parents think you are still a little kid? The changes in clothing sizes and school pictures from year to year and the toys they have put away or sold in yard sales remind them every day that you are growing into an adult very quickly. They definitely do not think of you as a little kid.

As far as having fun goes, your parents look for ways you can have fun. This is why they may allow you to be involved in sports or band or other activities and may plan vacations for you every year. There are many times that your parents sacrifice their own wants in order to give you yours.

Why do your parents say “no” to some things you want to do, and make rules? Why do they still insist on disciplining you, even at your age? They love you. They care deeply about you and your future. The writer of Hebrews had something to say about all of this. He said in Hebrews 12:11 that “No chastening (discipline) seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless afterward if yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” Thank God if your parents care enough to train you for your future. Honor and obey your parents. (Ephesians 6:1-2)

Like you, your parents are not perfect. They will make mistakes. Realize that they are doing their best to fulfill God’s will for them to be good parents. They will answer for the job they do someday, whether good or bad. Remember, they love you. –3049 Tyler Highway, Sistersville, WV 26175.

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